Beaufort NC – Looking at homelessness

I’ve got a home (my boat) for a little while, perhaps for another two or three weeks and then I’ll be homeless. I never imagined I’d ever be a homeless person but here it comes. I’m in a good place for this experience and I’m actually looking forward to it. That may sound odd but it’s true. I sold my house and got rid of most of my possessions in order to go cruising and that in itself proved to be one of the most powerful experiences of the whole journey. By that act of reduction I came to understand that “things” own you just as much as you own them. There is freedom to be gained by reducing one’s possessions. The declaration that “less is more” has never seemed truer to me.

I plan to move my stuff into my mini van, visit some friends in New England and then hit the road in search of a new home. But before I settle down I want to fully explore and experience the place called “homeless”. I sense that this might be a unique and powerful growth opportunity for me and I hope to make the most of it.

In the mean time I’m enjoying this transitory place I’m currently in: a dry storage marina in Beaufort NC. It’s beautiful here. The above photo was taken of the ICW (Intracoastal Waterway) from my back yard, just 200’ from were Gypsy is parked. And there are wild ponies on Carrot Island, just across the creek from downtown Beaufort. The folks around here are wonderfully warm and friendly. I hope I can pick up some of that southern charm to warm up my native yankee coolness.

Things have calmed down with Susan and that’s a much-welcomed improvement. She’s been a pretty harsh lately, carrying on like a scorned woman. The relationship is over, I fully accept at least half for the responsibility for its demise. I’m not interested in deciding who was right, who was wrong and picking the moral winner. Last week we talked and agreed that it’s to our mutual benefit to separate and go our different ways. That’s good enough for me but still it seems that Susan had some anger to work out. Yesterday I’d had enough. We had a hart-to-hert. I reminded her that we weren’t in high school. I told her that if she couldn’t stop punishing me I was going to leave immediately. That we could have the yard finish the work that needs to be done on Gypsy. She thought about it and decided to try to work with me in a civil way. So far she’s doing a good job of it.  It’s hard living and working with a hostile person. I hope we can keep this up till we're done, it will be a lot easer for both of us if we can. I think that endings are just as important as beginnings and want ours to be as good as possible. In fact there is no reason, given the right prospective, that it couldn't be beautiful except for out own limitations.

E - Beaufort NC – The ashes

It’s hot, damn hot (over 100 degrees) , humid too and I’ve been digging a hole in a gravel parking lot.  Why? Well, there in lies the story. You see I’m looking for a home. I’ve got one now, a boat but it’s going on the market and soon I’ll be homeless. Until them I’m occupying that boat with my ex-girlfriend in the sunny southern summertime and yes, it is hot; both physically and psychologically. So why am I doing this? To get to the other side.

Let me back up a bit to give you some background on my current situation. Eleven months ago I retired after 29 years in the aerospace industry. Ten months ago I moved aboard a sailboat that I jointly owned with my girlfriend. Nine months ago we departed Mystic CT for the Caribbean.  Our first passage was to Bermuda and that was a tough one; two 50kt gales in five days. Our vessel and her crew did well, especially compared to other boats that made the passage at the same time we did.  We felt like we had passed a hard test, which we did but what I didn’t realize at the time was that there were other threats more pervasive and ultimately more damaging than severe wind and water.  We only lasted 9 months, 5,000 miles, but what an amazing 9 months that was. It’s over now except for selling the boat and going our separate ways.

It’s not the intent of this blog to rehash that trip. (you can click here if you’re interested in seeing the blog of that journey) I mention it for two reasons; first because it explains how I arrived at this unique place in my life and second because there is some gross relevance with the previous trip and the one that I am soon to embark on. The relevance is that both journeys encompassed a search for a new home. I was hoping that we might find some unique, wonderful place to live. I didn’t find that place. What I did discover is a newfound love for my country of origin, America and an appreciation for all the folks that make up our country. When I left I was feeling fed-up with the endless succession of wars, state sanctioned torture, materialism, commercialism, consumerism, a self-serving political system and all of “us” who elected the politicians that were propagating that unsavory system. Now, after visiting several other countries, I realize all the good that we have here in the USA.  We’ve not perfect for sure and actually have a lot of work to do repairing our home. But I've come to the obvious realization that America is my county. Good or bad, it’s a huge part of me even though I’m just a small part of it. So this is were I’m starting my new search for my home, right back were I started from, but wiser – yes.

Back to the hole – my ex-grilfriend and I are getting the boat ready to sell. One of things I need to do is replace the rudder bearings. In order to do that I’ve got to “drop the rudder” and need a hole in the ground to provide enough clearance to remove the beast. Also on the to-do list is; sand and paint the bottom, a little engine work, clean and wax the hull, some minor electrical work and then sand and varnish some of the teak. Not too long of a list but it’s tough going with the emotional tension that has been building up like a summer thunderstorm. I pulled Susan aside today and asked her, in so many words, to back off the head games. It wasn’t an easy conversation but I think she heard me. Time will tell if we can see this through to the end in a civil manner. I hope we can…